I'm not sure how we got out of the practice, but my husband and I don't pray together like we used to. We pray for each other daily, often several times a day, and we pray together at the dinner table, giving thanks for His provisions.
But we don't sit down and confess our sins, fears, hopes, and praises together.
James 5:16 reads, "Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much."
This verse triggered me to reminisce about those times when my husband and I did come together in prayer. And I miss it.
But I admit, now when I daydream about sitting down with my husband in an intentional way, I worry it will turn into a "Let me confess your sins. Wait, let me get my notes," session.
Or I fear the discussions will be one-sided, because frankly, I don't want to talk about it. Let's just confess the facts, and move on. An introverted thinker married to a feeler makes for awkward conversations sometimes.
But I know this is not what God intended for our prayer time together and I'm not sure what changed. I don't have Five Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage Through Prayer and I can't offer a Three Lessons Prayer in My Marriage Taught Me, because it was a slow fade.
It was a different work schedule, unequal yokes, monotony and a myriad of other inconsequential nothings that added up to not much until months down the road we realized there was a space between us.
We filled that space with attention, affection, date nights and movies-at-home nights. But for me, there was still the most important piece missing. I truly believe that when we confess our fears, doubts, hopes and dreams to each other, before Christ, our marriage is truly strengthened.
Confession places us in a position of vulnerability. Sharing openly with our spouses helps them to know know more specifically how to pray for us.
And praying together honors God. It's a form of worship and praise. When a husband and wife come together, in Jesus' name to pray, it sends Satan reeling.
Because he creeps around your marriage looking for a silent way in.
He knows the maze of walls you've built between you and he knows how to slide in a few dead ends to make you feel defeated.
He knows the subjects that are too sensitive, the hurts that are buried. He knows the elephant in the room, and the subjects that just won't die.
But so does God and by His authority alone, Satan has no power over the fears and hurts that I allow in my heart. They are God's alone when I place them at the alter of his grace and mercy.
Friends, remember, by His grace we have been saved and, through faith and confession I can reconcile my differences with my husband and also be reconciled to Christ.
Any pain between us can be lifted up for healing. Our joys can be shared as we give thanks together.
I told my husband I'd really like to start praying together again. Starting right now. He agreed - and we are stronger and better together.
Do you and your spouse pray together? How has it made a difference in your marriage? I'd love to hear from you in the comments below.
Did you miss last week's post? Click here to read Caught by Surprise - When God puts me on my butt and catches me totally off guard, I've learned to get on my knees before him.